I am watching it again

I am watching it again.
The world gone mad.
Women and children targeted.
I don’t know how to respond.

I hesitate even as I write this, knowing that women and children in Syria have been under attack for much longer.

But I come back to this:
Suffering is suffering.
Loss is loss.
Death is death.
Comparison is always unhelpful.

I feel helpless watching the vision, so I turn it off.
Because I have that privilege.
Because it wasn’t me.
I won’t be haunted by those images for days, and weeks, and years to come.
And ‘cause I can’t stop crying.

I pray, ‘Lord, heal our broken world.’

And I call my husband just to hear his voice.
And I want to go down to the school and hug my kids.
But I won’t, ‘cause that would worry them.

And I stand in the kitchen not sure what to do next.
Because making a cup of tea, and carrying on seems heartless and unfeeling.

And I pray, ‘Peace be with them.
Peace be with us all.’

5 thoughts on “I am watching it again

  1. So many swirling thoughts Jodie as we watch this and hear this. I’m glad you wrote about it. I think it’s important we acknowledge each terrible thing that touches us and as writing is your thing, it’s appropriate that you wrote about how you feel, just like some others will talk about it. I’m concerned for so many things in the world today but one thing that scares me is that we could become immune to these events. Similar to the concept of “compassion fatigue” when we have seen too much of one disaster or one tragedy. You are so right also that we mustn’t forget those suffering in other places; in Syria, in Yemen, in South Sudan…wether it’s war of famine or the ugly combination of both. I also think it is true that our hearts tug a bit more for those we can relate to. I have a teenage daughter, of concert going age, so I can imagine waiting in my car outside the venue…similar to the Bangladesh attack last year in a restaurant I knew so well….this doesn’t mean we care less for the others I don’t think. It just means we feel some things more acutely. Peace be with those who suffer and peace be with you.

    • Thanks Sandie, I grew up in Manchester, three years as a TCK, so it is close to my heart. I used to worry about the fact that I cry so easily at the news, I am learning to embrace that, to understand that it is a good thing to feel sorrow when there is suffering in the world. Peace be with you and yours too xx

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